A kiss...and a Hug

It has been since Friday evening that I have held my precious little boy in my arms. I don't count the few times he vomited during his first night that I was able to whisk him from out of the warmer to clear his mouth of all the vomit while the nurses cleaned him up.

Since then, I have been able to sneak in a quick kiss, but in all honesty, they have been too few and far between. Since Monday, Callum has been making some great progress, but the progress he has made since yesterday has been staggering. We are so proud of Callum, and it really seems like he made the turn for the better.

Last night they started weaning his nitric oxide and at 10pm last night, they got his level down to 5, so that means he has to stay at that level until 10pm tonight when they can start weaning down to zero. They aren't rushing him, but they aren't going too slow. The kid is getting active and really trying to go for his breathing tube, so they really want to get him extubated as soon as possible - and you know what, so do I. I am so ready! I just want to kiss. hug. and hold my baby boy.

Today he had another really great day. They were able to continue weaning his vent settings and got his oxygen levels on the vent down nice and low. At 4pm today they made the decision to switch him from the oscillating ventilator to a conventional vent. How exciting!!! At 430pm today, they made the big switch. And did wonderfully. While they got him settled on the new vent, I got nice and close to him. I leaned over, gave him kisses and hugs, and oh my.......it felt oh sooo good to just put his skin to mine. The nurse took off his little shades (that protect his eyes from the bili lights) and.............

he opened his eyes. 


And do you know what? This was the first time I have seen his eyes open. Ever. Because his face was so swollen and bruised from the delivery, he couldn't open his eyes. I have to say that seeing his eyes open to look at his mamma after I kissed him was the best gift I could have gotten today. It made me cry and only want to just scoop him up into my arms to hold him tight. It's just so close...I am getting a little impatient!

This evening Kevin and I went up to visit him while a friend of ours watched the girls. When we walked in our nurse had a great big smile on her face. He was down to 25% oxygen!!!!!!! Room air is 21% - he is soooooo friggin close. They are assuming he will be extubated tomorrow.........I just hope he has a good night. I am trying not to get my hopes up, he's made so much progress, but I know he could still regress a bit.

All I can think about right now is holding him. Nursing him. Touching him and just treating him like a normal baby. It's hard to believe it has been almost a week since I have done any of that...And I am so ready.

Trying to put hand in mouth.....or pull tube out. Can't figure out which...

Yes...those are socks on his hands so he can't pull his tube out :)